Doctor What meets the Cyber Doctor
As I mentioned below I have spent the last month writhing in agony from what I had originally assumed was a particularly vicious dose of asian bird flu. After 2 weeks it was starting to appear that maybe it wasn`t bird flu; and then I went to hiroshima and it got worse, so I supposed it must be some sort of cold, since I didn`t sleep much in Hiroshima for rather enchanting reasons which are best explored with a visit to the Deilghtful Miss Ember`s blog. But after another week I got desperate and decided to do what I had really been hoping to put off - I visited the doctor.
The Doctor was an interesting experience, having in common with Australian Doctors the desire to diagnose asthma as quickly as possible. His diagnostic technique involved one question (do you have allergies) and a check of my breathing, upon which he determined I must have asthma. After all, it`s spring in a country I have never lived in, which is famous for its spring blooms; I couldn`t possibly have a previously unrecognized allergy. So he gave me stimulants, and now I am slowly recovering. I also threw out a kind of fake tatami rug from my room, which has a quite strong smell which I can actually feel burning my lungs when I breathe in. I had been pretending the problem wasn`t being caused by the rug (and also pretending that it doesn`t matter that my room smells a bit like a barn) but it had to go. I also yesterday went to a Taiko drumming performance in a hotel. The drumming had a phenomenal effect on my lungs, and I had to dash to the bathroom to cough them up, after which everything seemed to get a lot better. Life without lungs is more than its cracked up to be! I recommend taiko drumming as a cure for tuberculosis.
I suppose the taiko is a tale in itself, during which I stumbled on a tanuki and got told I was handsome, all rare events (especially in Australia). I shall tell this later, though. For now I have digressed to the tune of some 3 paragraphs, and must force my thoughts back into order and discuss the Doctor.
When I walked into his room the doctor was waiting for me. He was sitting at his desk in a position of thoughtful readiness, pen poised ready to write the "a" for "asthma", and he was wearing one of those masks you see in footage of tokyo. In Japan people sometimes wear surgical masks to work, and you see them walking along the street wearing these white paper masks tied behind their ears,. Legend has it they wear these masks to protect themselves from Japan`s massively polluted air, in this country which is really just one big city. The reality here of course is that most of Japan is forest and they don`t drive cars, so the air is very clean. I think actually people are wearing these masks because they don`t want to spread their cold to other people. But it is possible that the doctor was wearing a mask to protect himself from my cold, which when you think about it is actually a pretty sensible thing to do.
Unfortunately the mask completely obscured the nice man`s features, so you couldn`t tell what he was thinking, and when he spoke the mask moved with his breath. Before he spoke he had to breathe in and the mask sucked against his face; then it moved when he talked, all completely expressionlessly. The effect was rather like talking to a robot, which spoke with some sort of pneumatic system that pushed its synthetic skin. It was kind of disconcerting. Also, when one is speaking a second language one often chooses poor phrases, and Japanese people sometimes sound quite blunt when they speak english (even though they are trying to be very polite). For example it is impolite to say "you" in Japanese, but polite to refer to ones friend as "that man" or "that woman", which translates in English to he and she - so people speak about their friends or partners in their presence as if they were the cat`s mother. Which to the Japanese seems very polite but is not to us. So my cyberdoctor used some rather blunt phrases, while talking with an expressionless face that made a sucking noise.
This was my first brush with the masked Japanese person, and it was overall rather creepy. Although hygiene-wise these masks are probably an excellent idea, i recommend strongly against their adoption in the modern workplace. So stick that in your AWA and smoke it!
The Doctor was an interesting experience, having in common with Australian Doctors the desire to diagnose asthma as quickly as possible. His diagnostic technique involved one question (do you have allergies) and a check of my breathing, upon which he determined I must have asthma. After all, it`s spring in a country I have never lived in, which is famous for its spring blooms; I couldn`t possibly have a previously unrecognized allergy. So he gave me stimulants, and now I am slowly recovering. I also threw out a kind of fake tatami rug from my room, which has a quite strong smell which I can actually feel burning my lungs when I breathe in. I had been pretending the problem wasn`t being caused by the rug (and also pretending that it doesn`t matter that my room smells a bit like a barn) but it had to go. I also yesterday went to a Taiko drumming performance in a hotel. The drumming had a phenomenal effect on my lungs, and I had to dash to the bathroom to cough them up, after which everything seemed to get a lot better. Life without lungs is more than its cracked up to be! I recommend taiko drumming as a cure for tuberculosis.
I suppose the taiko is a tale in itself, during which I stumbled on a tanuki and got told I was handsome, all rare events (especially in Australia). I shall tell this later, though. For now I have digressed to the tune of some 3 paragraphs, and must force my thoughts back into order and discuss the Doctor.
When I walked into his room the doctor was waiting for me. He was sitting at his desk in a position of thoughtful readiness, pen poised ready to write the "a" for "asthma", and he was wearing one of those masks you see in footage of tokyo. In Japan people sometimes wear surgical masks to work, and you see them walking along the street wearing these white paper masks tied behind their ears,. Legend has it they wear these masks to protect themselves from Japan`s massively polluted air, in this country which is really just one big city. The reality here of course is that most of Japan is forest and they don`t drive cars, so the air is very clean. I think actually people are wearing these masks because they don`t want to spread their cold to other people. But it is possible that the doctor was wearing a mask to protect himself from my cold, which when you think about it is actually a pretty sensible thing to do.
Unfortunately the mask completely obscured the nice man`s features, so you couldn`t tell what he was thinking, and when he spoke the mask moved with his breath. Before he spoke he had to breathe in and the mask sucked against his face; then it moved when he talked, all completely expressionlessly. The effect was rather like talking to a robot, which spoke with some sort of pneumatic system that pushed its synthetic skin. It was kind of disconcerting. Also, when one is speaking a second language one often chooses poor phrases, and Japanese people sometimes sound quite blunt when they speak english (even though they are trying to be very polite). For example it is impolite to say "you" in Japanese, but polite to refer to ones friend as "that man" or "that woman", which translates in English to he and she - so people speak about their friends or partners in their presence as if they were the cat`s mother. Which to the Japanese seems very polite but is not to us. So my cyberdoctor used some rather blunt phrases, while talking with an expressionless face that made a sucking noise.
This was my first brush with the masked Japanese person, and it was overall rather creepy. Although hygiene-wise these masks are probably an excellent idea, i recommend strongly against their adoption in the modern workplace. So stick that in your AWA and smoke it!
posted by Sir S at 3:37 PM
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